KATHA 03
Merry Anniversary
Today is not the first time I took the plight of stairs to the rooftop. It’s almost every day that I seek to find comfort in its familiar setting: cold breeze by the pool, twinkling lights from the nearby establishments, and the unsettling yet entertaining evening city noise. However, today feels different. Maybe it was the holiday spirit emanating everywhere. Each step I take is heavier than the last. I took the last bit of courage I have to open the door only to be welcomed by a colder breeze of the wind.
It has always been our favorite place. Though it is not entirely ours, the whole condominium seems to have an agreement that when the sun has finally set, the rooftop should be vacated for us. Smiling with the thought, I put my blanket down and started setting up for a picnic. Like the usual, I bought our favorite meal: greasy fast-food burger with fries and large soda drinks with less ice for you.
I sat and looked by the door. It’s near 7pm already. I hope you get here fast because I have a lot to tell. My co-worker, Rina, was caught stealing Jeoffrey’s sandwich earlier. In her defense, Jeoffrey hid her pink pins last week. I don’t know but they scream an enemy-turned-lovers energy for me. They look cute together though.
My phone vibrated. I thought it was you who messaged but no. It was my sister again. I put my phone back in the pocket and looked at the sky. Contrary to how noisy and busy the city is, it looks peaceful up there… like the face of a parent watching her children play outdoors.
“Beautiful.”
“Really beautiful.” I turned my head and saw you looking at me. You’re here.
“Wow. What a cliché line.” I teased you, like always, because whenever you try to do cheesy pick-up lines, it was the oldest ones used in almost every romance book and movie.
“But that was true! You had a beautiful view up there but so was I!” Looking like you’re about to burst, I shook my head while smiling widely with my eyes closed. You stopped whining and watched me. You are really mesmerized with my beauty, aren’t you?
I’d be lying if I tell you I don’t feel butterflies in my stomach whenever you look at me intently, as if I am the only one you see. Would it be too much if I feel through your eyes that I am like a piece of treasure you would cherish and protect forever?
You moved by the pool and sunk both of your feet. I watched your back as you started telling me about your day. Your definition of an ordinary day at work seems to be different – that more than preparing and serving coffee to customers, you have amusing stories about their lives as well. A customer asking for refund as he complained for misspelling his name, two friends who has unrevealed love for each other chatting about their, as you say, “fake dates”, and more.
When you turned to look at me, I cannot help but stare. You are so engrossed in telling your story as was I, in memorizing every angle of your face. You just look so… innocent and happy. Brighter than the stars above us, your eyes shine whenever you smile and act out a memorable moment from your day. The longer I stare at you, the heavier and deeper my love feels.
If I did this often, I wouldn’t have taken you for granted, right?
“Actually, you know, I guess that’s what’s interestingly beautiful when meeting people. They may be temporary but in some weird reason, they stay.”
You looked at me and smiled. That’s when tears flooded my eyes. I cried hard and loud. All the remaining strength I had scrambled when I finally addressed that in today’s reality, you’re no longer here. There is no you by the swimming pool. There is no you telling me about his day. There is no you who will share our favorite meal together. You didn’t come.
It was all just a memory of the last day we saw each other.
If only I stared at you longer or if I asked that you stayed with me that night, you wouldn’t be caught in that accident. If only I… If only I knew that it would happen, I wouldn’t let you leave my sight. We will still be together, experiencing life as how you adored it, but no, it won’t happen anymore. It’s now just a thought of what could’ve been which kills me every single day.
My phone vibrated again. I know I am not drunk and it must be because of tears blurring my sight but I am seeing your name. It’s a scheduled e-mail, with a subject of “Our 1st to Lifetime”, containing your anniversary message for me. Knowing you, you would rather talk endlessly in person than type. I didn’t know that I’m capable of crying harder when I read your five-sentence message.
You are capable of anything.
Reach your dreams.
With or without me, continue.
Though better if we’re still together, I already feel lucky to share the same world with you.
You are always in my heart, just as I hope I am in yours.
“I miss you.”
You always remind me of how unexpected the twists and turns our lives have. You’re the more realistic person between us, and I loved that about you. I can’t forget that day when you asked me to be yours, that even though there’s a possibility that we’ll not last for long, you haven’t felt this much sure on committing to us. So was I.
We’re young adults wandering on our own through the world, curious about what lies around, until finally found our way towards each other. It was the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me, and it hurts so much that we stopped midway.
I nod my head. After a few deep breaths, I managed to calm myself. I stood up and looked at the sky. You’re right. The world continues to revolve no matter what. I should keep moving too… even without you… right? I smiled, biting my lips as I try to stop crying again. With a heavy sigh, I walked out of the rooftop taking surprisingly lighter steps.
“Ate, you’re home!” My little sister ran towards me the moment Mama opened the door. They’ve been bugging me to come home. As devastated as they were by your fate, they left me to grieve as I wished. We aren’t the sweet loving family and I thought we’re incapable of being intimate but they gathered around me to share our first group hug. I tried to control my emotions but failed.
Oh, please. I miss you… and I wish to celebrate this merry anniversary with you. I’ve been nice this year, I really tried, can I have you back?
This is a piece I wrote last year in an attempt to write in a narrative form aside from screenplays. Personally, I think I need to learn more about character building and incorporating it in short story/novel writing. I’m at this point when it’s crucial and necessary for me to detach myself with the character speaking. Glad that I’m taking classes, seeing these posts from other writers I follow, and listening to your critiques. Here’s to allowing ourselves to improve!
What are your thoughts about this piece? Drop it in the comments or talk with me through my socials. Hope you had a good read and slay your day ahead!
we thought we cannot 